Monday, November 18, 2013
Day Eighteen
On Sunday morning, I got to help out with the YouthSpirit group for our middle school-aged kids. Tonie Scullion was facilitating, and we were talking about impermanence.
Tonie asked the kids to share something that had changed for them in the past year. Then she asked, “so which do you like better: this year, or last year?”
Clearly, kids and adults experience life on a different scale. But we forget sometimes that children deal with many of the same kinds of issues as adults do. Many kids are dealing with new environments, or unfamiliar territory – unsure of expectations. Many are dealing with new people coming into their lives, and the loss of old friends or loved ones. Some feel that they themselves have changed – and are not always sure they like the person they’re becoming. Some feel like life is just happening to them, passing them by. There’s not always something they can find to be excited about.
The answers to Tonie’s question varied widely around the circle, until one child summed it up like this: “I guess… this year is better, because I still have the memories of last year.”
What memory are you grateful for? How can you practice gratitude for that memory, knowing it will never quite be what it was again? How have others helped you carry forth this memory? How can you practice gratitude today, for something that will then become a new memory? Share your reflections in the comments below, or in your gratitude journal.
- Lee
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Today is a former girlfriend's birthday. Many years have passed since we were together, and I feel blessed for the time that we shared and for all that I learned about myself when we were together, and when we parted ways. It was not an easy road--but, we still try to stay in touch. Today I learned that her mother's cancer has returned, that her daughter was hit by a car and is in the hospital with some brain trauma, that her niece died of a drug overdose a few weeks ago, and that a co-worker was murdered a few days ago. She described it as being in a whirlwind of tragedy..... As we talked more, we shared memories of her mom and daughter when we were together.... This made us laugh a lot! So, tonight I hold her in prayer and light, as these memories remain close to my heart.
ReplyDeleteMy grandparents had a dairy farm in central Maine. I spent some part of each summer and some part of every Christmas break up there. It was heaven.... I had a pony, 25 cats and kittens, three puppies, I was allowed to DRIVE when I was like 12, and there were almost no rules (except don't get killed, which was easier than you might think). In addition to the animals, there were lessons... true life lessons on birth, death, hardhship, and the value of HARD work (I was put to work in the barn at age 8, earning 5 cents per hour... one summer I made 11 dollars and I had NEVER been more proud of myself).
ReplyDeleteMy grandparents lost the farm in the ice storm of 1996 (1997?) and they both died within the last 4 years. Those memories they made with me are priceless, irreplicable, and visceral to my core... not to mention to the core of who I am.
I live them out now through my own child... I truly believe that I identify with being UU, being a mother, being an unschooler, and being a wife because of these sacred and precious memories. As each day passes, I offer them gratitude, and try to teach my child the things I learned on the farm and hope beyond wildest hopes that some of the memories he makes today are the ones he will reflect on in 30 years.
I am grateful for the many wonderful memories of my then two small children. So many things they did so funny, so sweet. And as they grow I find I don't lament that those times have passed, as much as appreciate the young adults they are becoming. I don't take quite as many photos of them now, and there aren't quite as many cuddly moments. But tonight we laughed around the table about a play we are in together, finding the same things funny and building on each others' thoughts...enjoying each others' company and humor on such a different level from when they were young, but still making (I hope!) more fond memories of our time together.
ReplyDeleteI can relate with Carol's memories of her kids when they were young. I used to love breakfasttime with all five of them chatting and hustling to get ready for school and ribbing each other about their outfit or hair. It was a sound like water running down a stone filled shallow creek. It was a time before teenage angst and misjudgments and
ReplyDeleterotten behavior overtook them one by one. Now that they are adults, I can enjoy all of them again when we are together.